FAQ: Memorial Services

Simply put, a memorial service is not a funeral. Although both ceremonies have structure and are intended to bring the community together in support and remembrance, one is far more formal than the other. A memorial service is not led by clergy but guided by a celebrant or master of ceremonies. It allows all who attend the service to participate on some level, not just to observe and reflect.

Visualizing a memorial service as a mid-point on the spectrum of service format possibilities is helpful. On one end is the more formally-structured, clergy-led funeral service (often with three components: the visitation, funeral, and a committal service held at the cemetery). At the other end of the spectrum is the celebration of life. In this event, the deceased's life–their passions, intellectual pursuits, and personal accomplishments–are the focus of attention. A funeral isn't truly celebratory, whereas a celebration of life is all about celebration. A memorial service could be said to be a gentle mix of the two; however, in all honesty, each memorial service is unique. We encourage you to speak with your funeral professional for further insights.

We need to find out which service would be the best in your unique situation. In fact, it's not even part of our job to tell you; instead, our work is to show you the spectrum of possibilities. We can explain your options and make suggestions to empower you to make the best possible decision.

The answer to this depends upon the 'bells & whistles'–the special features–you've selected during the arrangement conference. When you sit with a funeral director to discuss service costs, you'll receive a copy of the firm's General Price List. This will detail all the essential professional services included in the price of your loved one's memorial service and the cost of any ancillary products or services you've purchased. Call us to get a better idea of what your loved one's memorial service will do for you and what it will cost.

You'll discuss some things with your funeral director involving purchases from outside vendors. You will be asked to pay for those items at the time of the arrangement conference. One of the most common is the fee charged by a newspaper to print your loved one's obituary. Another cash advance charge could be for clergy or musician's fees, floral arrangements, and reception necessities, such as food/beverage or facility rental. Your funeral director will provide you with a detailed invoice for all cash advance items.

The vendors we work with, including the newspapers, florists, caterers, and musicians, all require us to pay for goods and services when ordered or at the time of delivery. Our relationship with them requires us to charge you for them at the close of the arrangement conference. Your funeral director will take time to explain any and all of the necessary cash advance expenses incurred as part of your service planning.

A good rule of thumb is to expect to pay at the time the service contract is signed (at the time of the arrangement conference, or soon afterwards).

We've actually written several pages on memorial service planning. Still, the short answer would include selecting the service's location, date, and time. You'll be asked to identify the specific readings, musical selections, food or beverages, and/or the activities you'd like to feature and the people you would like to participate in the service itself. Memorial service planning isn't complex; it's empowering. After all, you've got a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to show the world how much your loved one meant to you. We invite you to speak with one of our service planning professionals to learn more.

Your funeral director will need you to specify the where and when, for example. Together you'll make important decisions about other specifics. Still, once those decisions are made, you can "step back" and let us handle everything or have as much input as you please. It's truly 

You'll need to provide the documents/information required to complete your loved one's death certificate and obituary. You can also bring in a collection of family photographs to be used in making a tribute video or in the decoration of the service location. Other items may be needed at some point, depending on the arrangements made. Your funeral director will provide you with an exact list of the things they should like you to bring to the arrangement conference.

A celebrant is a person who has been trained to conduct formal ceremonies, such as weddings, baptisms and funerals. They are not clergy; instead they are experienced masters-of-ceremony and story-tellers. A celebrant works closely with surviving family to create a ceremony which reflects the beliefs, cultural background, values and aspirations of your deceased loved one, and your family. If you think you would be best served by a celebrant, please speak with your funeral director.