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Dressing for a Funeral
What to Wear to a Funeral
What should I wear to a funeral?
As funeral home staff members, we hear this question all the time from people who are unsure about funeral clothing and dress code. Honestly, it’s a difficult question to provide a concrete answer for. Casual, formal, business professional? Every family is different and they each have their own expectations.
Much like funeral service itself has evolved over the years, so too has dressing for a funeral. If you find yourself debating what to wear to a funeral, the best answer is dress conservatively. Wearing a suit or nice dress and being considered overdressed is never a bad thing. It’s also inherently better to be the person that is overdressed than the one that is underdressed.
After all, attending the service is about honoring the deceased and saying goodbye. Showing up underdressed can make you stick out and may be seen as disrespectful by others.
What do men wear to a funeral?
When it comes to funeral attire for men, keep three things in mind and you should be fine. First, a suit and/or dress shirt is recommended. A dark suit paired with an ironed white dress shirt and dark tie to match is always the best look. While most men will choose to wear a suit, a nice pair of slacks and a shirt and tie is also acceptable. If you are a member of the immediate family or have a role during the service like a reading or you are a pallbearer, try to wear a suit and look your best.
The second tip is to match your shoes to your suit. An easy way to ruin a great outfit is by wearing the wrong color of shoe. Brown shoes go best with a blue, brown or light grey suit. Black shoes match with a black, dark blue or dark grey suit.
The third and final tip is to minimize the jewelry. There is nothing wrong with wearing a nice simple watch. Just remember to be conservative when selecting what accessories to add to your outfit. If possible, avoid large or oversized jewellery that catches attention. This may be seen as being flashy or showing off.
What do women wear to a funeral?
Funeral services are a time to pay your respects to the deceased. Similar to men’s funeral attire, make sure that you choose a conservative outfit to wear. A business suit or a simple dress that covers the shoulders and knees should suffice. If you want to wear something different, many women will wear dress pants with a nice sweater or blazer. Try to stick to more subtle colors like black, gray, dark blue, or purple and avoid overly floral patterns or vibrant colours.
While attending a funeral service, there will be a lot of sitting, standing and walking (especially if you plan to attend the graveside service). You want to make sure you select shoes that you will be comfortable in all day. While high heels or strapped sandals may look great, they can leave your feet aching and uncomfortable. If you know that a pair of shoes are incredibly uncomfortable, it’s best to avoid wearing them.
When it comes to jewelry, try to keep it to a minimum as well. While it’s ok to wear earrings, a necklace and rings, just don’t go overboard. Stick to wearing just a few simple yet elegant pieces that will compliment your outfit. If you can, try to wear a piece of jewelry that the deceased owned or had gifted to you to pay tribute to them.
Dressing for A Funeral - Do’s and Don’ts
As you’re considering what to wear to the service, here are some do’s and don’ts to keep in mind.
Do
Consider the Time and Location of the Service
The location of a service and time of year should influence your choice in clothing. For instance, the clothes worn to an outdoor ceremony in the summer will be much different than one in the fall or winter. Also consider where the service will take place. If you will be attending a graveside service, the terrain of the cemetery might be difficult to walk across in high heels.
Ask for Advice
If you’re unsure about what to wear to a funeral, ask for advice. Whether it’s the funeral director or the immediate family, reach out and ask if your outfit is OK. If you will be attending a more informal service, the family may have requested that guests dress in more casual outfits.
Don't
Buy A New Outfit You Can’t Afford
It’s OK to go out and purchase some new things if you want them and can afford them. However, don’t feel like you need to break the bank to buy an entirely new outfit. Don’t look past local thrift shops or second-hand stores. You can often find great looking dress wear in good condition for a fair price.
Stress About Being
Under Dressed
You might feel stressed about what you are planning to wear. Don’t. Remember, you’re there to honor the deceased, and people will be more focused on that rather than what you’ve chosen to wear. As long as you make an effort to show up and appear respectful, what you are wearing isn’t nearly as important as being there to show support and say goodbye.
The way you dress for a funeral is a reflection of your respect for the deceased individual. Always remember to consider what the person would want everyone to wear. Make sure to take the time to plan out your outfit so that you can alleviate stress and give the person the final send-off they deserve.